I believe I get to share what I want to and still maintain my privacy

DSP95

Do I really share a lot

Or do I just say that I do?  When I am sharing, what is the purpose of the sharing in the first place/  how when where why do I have to be the one to share, Spirit?  I think it is remarkable that I have this gift of words, but I need to know so many more words than I do.  How do I do that?  And what about getting the words out there?  How am I going to get THAT done?  AND, what about the fact that I am so random it seems?  Or, vague and indecisive in my speech?  Why do I talk in circles?  Why the FUCK can’t I stop thinking about him?  This is not an essay about how not to let him get away, he has a folder somewhere, and I am already at peace with the fact that he got away.  That is why I don’t write or talk about him.  I wanted to love him wholly and completely. But I didn’t so it does not matter.

Or does it?  Obviously, I  am having a hard time not thinking about him.  I really don’t know why either….. I can’t stand that that junk went so badly.  I felt extremely hurt by him……. I was out of control so much so that I could not even express to him what was going on.

And it’s not that I am stuck on him, or am I?  If I am writing about something, does it mean I am stuck, or moving through.  Let me stop bullshitting and move on.

 

~Excerpt from DayDreams, Night Dreams, On Finding My Piece of Peace

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About shameekadream (51 Articles)
Shameeka Dream is Founder of the Dream Reiki Project, a movement to train and support healing arts and artists.

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